Manual of Etiquette: I - Introduction to Etiquette
From FiranMUX
There are a great many people today, both young and old, who sniff at the idea of a scroll containing the details of etiquette, considering the very subject to be old fashioned and obsolete. Indeed, a scroll containing the minutiae of largely irrelevant detail, such as the correct fork with which to eat, should be next to useless without first establishing the purpose of etiquette in our society. Etiquette is not the mindless adherence to arbitrary rules for their own sake, but is rather the mechanism by which we may make our way more smoothly in society. Good manners are the polish by which a good man or woman may become great, based as they are in common sense, decency and morality above all things.
From the time the first Summans came together to form a civilisation, rules have evolved to allow us to live peaceably together and further the cause of the society formed beyond that of the individuals within it. While some of these rules are formalised as law, those remaining are grouped under the title of etiquette, protecting our civilisation from a descent into barbarism.
The first law of etiquette, if it might be styled so, is consideration. Consideration for others, all others, that one should not cause them offence, and consideration for one's own reputation that it might not be besmirched. While there are obvious differences between the classes of Firans, there is no reason that one should treat another, even one of significantly lower station than yourself, with anything but the utmost courtesy. One does not treat another with courtesy because he or she is worthy of receiving it, but because you are worthy of giving it. To treat another brusquely or rudely reflects poorly on your own character, not on his or hers. Should another be rude, wittingly or unwittingly, respond with the courtesy due had they been absolutely polite. To do otherwise lowers you to their standard.
The second law of etiquette fits neatly in with the first, and may be summed up in one word: integrity. When a lady or gentleman gives her or his word, it may not be broken without serious slight to her or his character. A promise should not be lightly given, as one would not consider swearing an oath, unless one is prepared to go to whichever measures necessary to complete their obligation. Integrity does not necessarily mean that one must speak the whole truth, as often the truth may be offensive to hear, or even undermine the security of the Republic depending on to whom one is speaking, but it does mean that everything one does say should be true. Should a lady ask for your opinion of a stola she wears with great pride, it should be inconsiderate to inform her that it is, in your opinion, hideous. Instead, one might comment on the appealing parts of the garment, perhaps the colour is to your liking or it appears to be well made.
The third law of etiquette is humility. One must accept humbly any praise or criticism with equal measure, and allow word of one's own exploits and those of one's family to disseminate through other people than yourself. There is little in the world more crass than to stand and boast of your achievements, to laud the skills of your children and to brag of your spouse's great merits. If they have such merits, they should be apparent to society by their actions rather than by your words, and to publicly lionise oneself or close family for any act, no matter how large or small, is to belittle it in the eyes of those around you.
The astute reader will observe the common thread in each of these three laws of etiquette, which is that propriety dictates protecting one's own reputation and that of others with the utmost care. Our reputation is the armour by which we shield our character from any onslaught, and like the metal or leather armour worn by our brave soldiers, must be regularly maintained and cared for lest it break at a crucial moment, leaving us exposed to all manner of indignity. A reputation which takes twenty years to build can by five minutes of ill thought be shattered beyond repair, leaving us shunned and outcast from good society. One's good reputation should be at the forefront of one's mind before taking any action. Any action may be wholly innocent but should it appear otherwise to an outsider then one's reputation may be ruined. If one does not wish to be known as a lady or gentleman of dubious moral character, one must take care to ensure that one should never appear so.
